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Monday, June 20, 2011
62. To The Moon And Back @ Monday, June 20, 2011

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Just in case you didn't know, one of my closest neighbor which I called Tok Aji just passed away. Due to an interior health disease and old age sickness at the age of 78 years old. Well, we did expect this thing to come anyway but it happened to be on the day after Father's Day (too soon?) It's kinda personal to mention here but to made everything mess up, he passed away alone.. at home early in the morning. Without all his children, proud son and daughter. I really can't. Dad was like "This shouldn't be happened for someone old to face Sakaratul Maut alone, with no one whisper Syahada at his ear. And no one reside Yassin beside him all the time." 
So these thing brought me here writing about life relationship as a daughter to one and only dad, Mohd. Khalim bin Abu Amin.

I did write a few things about my dad in this blog before right? How proud I am to be his daughter and yes I am. Everything about him is amazing. This is the man that bought me a Doraemon's doll after whining so much when I was 4, just because I saw my cousin's own one. The man that took me and sister fishing every weekend at Teluk Chempedak, Kuantan even though I don't giving a care on it. The one that taught 4 of us how to remember  Mathematics' table strictly when the fact that we secretly wrote it down on the study's board. The one that picked me up at primary school with his motorcycle and classmates said he's rock HAHA. The one I go when mum says NO. The one that understand his child better than mum. We just "Locomotor Mortis!!" out loud and he looked at us weird and he passed by and sees Harry Potter's trailer on the pc and was like "Ohhh okay." HAHA. Though he called Potter's film as a ghost movie. Of course its not :\ The one that shaped and formed me into the person I am today.

I don't think I've ever heard the phrase "You can't do it," come out of his mouth. He has always behind me 100% when everyone else said no. The phrase where I went through at high school was pretty much the prove but I disappoint him. Lots of time, I knew it and I'm so sorry. I never saw him crying to be honest, except on the day PakLong Din passed away. As the last child of the family, his departure grabbed dad's spirit, and I saw him shed tears. Ayah, don't cry. It kills me. I don't know if he is going to cry on my life-changing event, such as graduation or wedding. But I will cry with him, promise. 

We never talk openly about feeling and all. Yes, all dad out there are stiff and awkward. But he once told us that if ever Allah gives a chance, he wants mum to depart first and let him to be the one who'll be alone. How complicated is that? I really can't. I can't. Stay healthy both of you. Remember the first gift we gave him on his birthday? Its the car perfume lmao. And soon after all these, it will be a real car hahah promise. I will, everything for you. 

So ayah, when you eventually across this blog post, I don't know but I hope you read this. I love you to the moon and back, a million times over, bestfriend & nae beonho han namja. 
p/s: Don't takes thing for granted, be appreciative. 

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