Sunday, September 14, 2014
168. Being Rangga @ Sunday, September 14, 2014
I kind of losing words on things I should write here in this blog. Been typing and deleting for about an hour (or more), what a lazy brain of mine. Wake up! Where is inspiration when it is deadly needed.
Recently, I've been discovering and experiencing tons of rainbow feelings, how should I describe it for you. I truly wanted to express it by words but words are currently failing me big time (at least I am trying by now). Re-watching Ada Apa Dengan Cinta begins this colorful thought of mine, for some weird reason.
"Tiba-tiba saya jadi suka menulis puisi, agar terkesan romantis. Entah mengapa, saya mendadak terobsesi dengan sosok Rangga yang misterius dan dingin. Mungkin secara sikap dan perilaku, saya berhasil menjadi Rangga wanna be. Pria tertutup, misterius, suka baca puisi dan suka bikin puisi. Namun, saya lupa satu hal yang mendasar. Tokoh Rangga diperankan oleh seorang Nicholas Saputra, yang notabennya ganteng!" - sayadanhidupsaya.wordpress.com
To keep things moving, no, I dont write poem. However, I am currently suffering this old literature kind of addiction. Been digging out some antique novels for the past month, notably "Tenggelamnya Kapal van Der Wijck" by Hamka and some Indonesian x Malay historic piece of work. It has been an in and out of journey to be honest but I will try to make more fun of it. :)
Rekindle old friendship is interesting. Few days ago I joined for a visit of an old friend of ours. Naturally, we had a fair share of amusement on our golden day, the old stories, laughing over the silliness of our teenage years. (Sort of imagining Ku Bahagia by Melly Goeslaw creeping play from behind the scene). Despite us being in the first class (inserts people imagining Pure Science stream), highschool was a fun place to be. We dont chase after guys or fight over silly things but we dont read books till books read us neither. We cheated on books during test and shared the answers with the rest. Those who wrote down sort of promises "to hold such reunion on 2014", "prospect gifts for my wedding" etc when they were still teenagers. Now you can see the background of my upbringing, the- where was I coming from -answer to the question.
Very teenage like; story-telling wise, truly not worth your penny if this is potentially to be dub in a film. Cause we were that boring young girls you'd met countlessly in your school days.
Perhaps these dullness is the reason to be grateful. Grateful that I'd came from this kind of humble yet engaging place, it wasn't grand but my teen life was beautifully written out here.
Ah! For those people with the wits of a storyteller, I am so envious of you! These group of people can simply tossing off with words, with their fingers flying on the keyboard writting one beautiful story at the end. I wanted to be like them but seeing my current form is the saddest thing at the moment. Struggling even with an essay in Bahasa, has never hitting me this hard yet. That moment when you realize that you've been leaving writing days since your last school days. Nevertheless, I'll get over it and will try to write more naturally.
Cause when the stars drawn out on the night sky, it will bring up old memories,
and I will take them out of my old diaries.
For me look and pick back all those things happened literally.
It has been hitting me finally that I've been acting like an old peotic 50-er aunty reminiscing her youth life with the way I wrote this entry, but fret not, this is always the way I appreciating life and people around me.
P/s: Cheap edit, thanks to the lazy technology and broken lappy. Some pictures were taken from our Goguma gathering happening last August. So much love!
P/s/s: I am not Rangga.