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Tuesday, August 18, 2015
182. Dreams Catcher @ Tuesday, August 18, 2015

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While sending off Imeen at the nearest bus terminal back to Bangi yesterday, Jeehan shades her tears and I lost in my own kind of thought. Both of us, sullen with another separation (growing up, being an adult, is such a pain) blindly watching strangers: a dad shooing off his little son from the bus he's going to ride soon cos little one doesn't want to let him free, he goes so heartbroken, was so sicked of it.  But daddy knew, it was for little one's sake. Yes I never really fond of that place. I think it carries a weight of sadness. But to see the beauty in ugly, is comforting the agony in it, comforting everything else. 

Because everyone is an actual fighter in their kind of battle. A struggle and a dream catcher, for dream is what brings us to be where we are right now. I would like to recall on one Indonesian female counterpart I met at such place, she probably had left her family in order to feed them right. I would like to remember that Imeen left home, once again, one after another, to pursue his first diploma. I would always love to remember that there will always be pain, in order to gain. For life is not a bed full of roses. 

And that brings me to jot down, written a self reflection, sort of post. (My tendency to write something reflecting is a spot on!)

I have always wanted to further my study, had wrote it down quite a few time regarding the matter. Earlier this month, I received an email congratulated me for my submission to further the study has been successfully accepted. But it was so sudden, I was unprepared. I have so many enquiries flooded my mind, can I brain with the prospect of me studying and working at the same time? How about ibu and ayah, would they be okay with it? 

It was overwhelming though. 

In addition on that, I received an offer of taking a professional license from my HR, telling me that the whole procedure will be a sponsored one. Had I being a good kid to receive such priviledge? They wanted me to study on the related course but I always remind myself, I do not find such a major appeal to carry on this field. Yes, it brings money, if that whats you think of, but I want to do what I wanted to do. 

But since it goes unprepared, I let them, both of the offers to be deferred. For what I need right now is time, a bit of it. Phew, I wish I have gut to drop whatever burden weighing on me, and start doing what I need, want to do, right now. Its a now or never! But as for now, chasing a dream, becoming a dream catcher, is pretty much, quite satisfying. Alhamdulillah.


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